How To Overcome Fears

If I walked up to 10 strangers and asked them “Are you happy with your current career?  Are you excited to get up and go to work everyday?  Are you passionate about what you do?”  8 out of 10 would say “No” to all these questions. 

Many people dream of an occupation that will provide them with more freedom to spend time with their families, to travel, to relax, etc.  However, 80% of all Americans are unhappy with their careers.  Why is that?  Why do so many people settle for a j.o.b. (just over broke) that they don’t even like?  1 of the biggest reasons is FEAR. 

• Fear of what our family thinks
• Fear of going “outside of box” and doing something different
• Fear of not making enough money with our dream careers
• Fear of failure

So, what is fear anyway?  In Jack Canfield’s best selling book, The Success Principles, he said psychologists describe fear as: 

F – Fantasized
E – Experiences
A – Appearing
R – Real

We all experience fear.  We fantasize about negative events that may never actually happen.  For example, you may want to change careers, but you’re afraid of failing or afraid of what your family will say.  So, you start to think – my family will laugh at me – I won’t make it – I can’t do it – I won’t make enough money. 

Stay focused on making your dreams come true today.  Overcoming fears may seem challenging to you, and you may be thinking, “How do I really overcome my fear?”  That’s a great question.  It’s easier than you may think. 

• Replace your negative fantasies/feelings with positive ones
• Remember times when you overcame fear
• Build up your self-confidence

If you want to change careers and you’re experiencing fear, simply visualize that you’re already in the new career.  Visualize that you’ve achieved your goals.  Imagine what you would feel like.  Focus on those positive fantasies and sensations like joy, happiness, courage, self-confidence, etc. 

In the past, everyone has overcome different fears.  When you were younger, you were probably afraid to ride a bike, dive off the diving board, etc, but you eventually did it.  You may have been afraid to ask someone out on a date, meet someone’s parents, or kiss someone for the first time.  Again, you conquered your fears and did it anyway. 

For those of you who are happily married, what would have happened if you would’ve never asked your spouse out on a date – well you wouldn’t be married today. 

Never tell yourself “I Can’t.”  Take those words out of your vocabulary today.  If you tell yourself you can’t do something, then you won’t achieve it.  Always tell yourself “I can do it.” 

Create a list of affirmations to recite everyday like:

• I am exuding self-confidence.
• I am worthy.
• I am courageous.
• I believe in myself.
• I can achieve anything that I truly believe.
• No matter how hard it gets, I am going to make it.
• I can do it.

Children have more self-confidence than many adults.  If a child wants a piece of candy, they keep asking for it.  They’re relentless.  They have a “never give up” attitude.  All of us have natural born talents.  As children, we naturally do the things that we love.  If we love dancing, we dance all the time.  If we love swimming, we want to swim all the time.  If we love football, we want to play as much as possible.  Children do things that they’re passionate about.  But somewhere along the way, we lose that passion. 

As we begin to grow up, we go through life’s struggles (losing a job, getting divorced, going through bankruptcy, losing a home, etc).  As adults, we begin to focus on all the negative events in our lives, and we forget the positive events.  That causes a loss of confidence.