Turn Trouble Into Triumph
By Keith Cook
What can you do when your friends, business partners or loved ones are not on board in your pursuit to accomplish your goals? What steps can you take to ensure you create a win win situation? Is that even possible? With any conflict, opposition, or setback, you can turn the situation into a benefit. You just want to explore options on both sides of the fence.
Finding a solution that will allow the other party to feel appreciated can be difficult and down right exhausting. You can find yourself, bending over backwards and still not getting a fair shake. This can become frustrating and lead you to doing something drastic. But there are options you can take to accomplish your goals when others aren’t buying in to what you are working toward.
Below are some strategies that will provide you a truly favorable outcome whether you are selling a product, selling your parents on using the car, selling your kids on going to bed early, selling a business partner on an idea, or selling your in-laws on a vacation spot that you want to visit, instead of where they want to visit.
The first thing you want to do is actively listen to what they are saying. This is the first technique we learned in coaching. You want to give your undivided attention. Then you ask the question, what does success look like to you? What does the accomplished goal look like to you? What does the end result look like to your business partner, to your parents, to the team you are on or to your spouse?
If we were sitting here a year from now, or at the end of summer, or by New Year’s, because you want to a time frame on the event, what would’ve had to have happened in order for us to accomplish this goal, or feel good about our success? Allow your parent, business partner, friend, or spouse paint the picture of how they see things. You want to get a clear picture of the ideal state and end result from their eyes. When you have a vision or understanding of what their accomplished goal looks like, you can create a fair and even exchange where everyone involved gets what they want.
Secondly, what course of events would’ve happened for you to feel good about your progress, or the business’ progress, or the progress of our relationship? So whats the ideal state, what will it take for us to get where we want to get to, what’s your definition of success? And then address the current condition that’s not that. This provides you with a benchmark as to where you are now in comparison to where you want to be.
The third question you ask is, what are the obstacles in the way of you getting there? You can use a technique called a swot analysis. The “S” stands for the strengths, skills and talents that you have. The “W” stands for weaknesses that need to be addressed and the “O” stands for opportunities that need to be explored and captured. So what are the opportunities out there that you can take advantage of. And the “T” stands for threats. What are the dangers in the market place, within our company, within ourselves, within our family, within our relationship, that could stop us from being successful. It could be the competition, it could be your limiting beliefs, it could be your fears, it could be your lack of knowledge.
The fourth step is to demonstrate to your parents, your friend, your business partner, your spouse, or whoever you are interacting with, show them how your project, your plan, your goal, or whatever it is you are wanting to offer or promote, will actually help move them from the current state to the ideal state.
You know, if you were to just go in like you are selling your idea to your parents, the team, your business partner or spouse, you are in a sales position and they are probably resisting because they have their own thoughts and agenda. But if you can get them to be clear about what success looks like to them and address the current situation and help them see the difference between the two, the obstacles that need to be dealt with, and do the swot analysis. Speak to them using the same words and language they use to communicate with you. So now you are speaking in their terms and using words and verbiage they are familiar with, as you paint the picture of the ideal state and what they want.
This certain way of doing things creates a great deal of control and momentum, which translates into an extremely abundant and favorable outcome. Your intentions are to create a very conductive environment where all the parties involved get what they want and you get what you love.
Another process you can use is to sit down and think of all the obstacles that can come up, think of every problem, think of every road block, think of every possible thing that could go wrong. Then ask yourself, what are three strategies that you can use to address the problems or obstacles, so when they come up, you can deal with them. So when you are presented with an obstacle, you now have 3 options to choose as your next course of action. This is an extremely effective technique to use because you are giving yourself options. When you have options, especially options that are on the same level or better than what you are doing, it can only be a positive outcome.
We all know that people can be very pessimistic and find things wrong with everything you do. So when you propose your idea to them and you have solutions to their objections, this puts you in a position that enables you to receive what you want. This really makes life fun, exciting and you begin to look forward to each moment!
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